Hot dogs are like a good pair of jeans - they are easy to accessorize. Different color denim - different types of meat. A belt? Ketchup. I like hot dogs because the flavor in them is basic, but they are easy to dress up, and stylize with a pair jacket or any number of other toppings. Okay, that’s enough of that metaaphor.
Instead of a metaphor, let me tell you about a mountain of gluttony that I scaled late last year. I was on vacation in Phoenix, Arizona and on one of our last nights in town, we went to Alice Cooperstown restaurant near the stadium downtown. Co-owned with Randy Johnson, the pitcher who exploded a fucking bird during Spring Training in 2001, the restaurant features a menu item named for Johnson, the Big Unit. (FYI, the video incorrectly identifies the bird as a duck. It was actually a dove. And his name is Johnson, not Jackson. I think they might be mislabeled because the MLB has removed every other video of the incident.)
Weighing in at one full pound and measuring 22 inches and served on a full baguette, this meal is also served with two sides. This daunting dog was featured on Man versus Food as the fully loaded Big Unit. Plus sides. I’m not totally insane, and I wasn’t high, so I stayed safe with the sides of chili and fries.
Because I’m The Man, I managed to finish my Big Unit and it’s accompanying side dishes. My two friends that I was competing against did not fare as well as I did. B ate about half of his monster, and K chickened out. He peeled the casing off of the meat, didn’t work on the bread, and still didn’t finish the Vienna Beef.
I was inspired to write this post because hot dogs for me are a good stand by food when you aren’t sure what you want to flavor your food with. It’s easy to go sweet (ketchup), salty (cheese), or spicy (Siracha). I made two unique hot dog blends recently and wanted to share them. Today’s selection, show immediately below,
Smoke well,
XY
PS. hot dogs are also known as wieners. WIENERS I SAY!